I became increasingly frightened of policemen during this time.  I was afraid that my dad was going to come take us again and he would have to have the police come with him to get us.  To this day when I see a policeman or a police car, I get this terrible feeling in the pit of my stomach.  We would hide when we saw a police car drive by.  We had a plan to go out the back door if the police ever showed up at our house and go over to the church to hide. 

One night, it happened.  My dad showed up at the parsonage with the police and his custody papers in hand.  He had V.C. with him again and he was DRUNK AS A SKUNK.  We couldn't believe the police would even come with him in that state, but I guess since V.C. was the one driving, they didn't care.  We saw them drive up and tried to go out the back door to the church; but there was a policeman waiting in the back yard for us.

We were at the door and my mom was crying and asking my dad not to do this again.  Then V.C. said, "Why don't we let the kids decide what they want to do."  The police asked my mom and my dad if they would both go along with our decision.  They both said yes.  So we went into the back room and talked.  In our discussion, we said, we didn't want to hurt Daddy's feelings, but we wanted to stay with my mom.  When we told Daddy that, he said, "It doesn't hurt my feelings."  But he cried as he walked away.  

Not long after that our church had a revival.  I don't remember the pastor's name or what he said, but I remember having a feeling that I needed God in my life.  I had no idea what a Father was supposed to be like, but I knew I wanted God for mine.  I accepted Jesus as my Savior on a Wednesday night and then was baptized on Sunday along with my Uncle Aubrey (my mom's brother) who had been saved the Sunday before.

Later that same year my 5th grade teacher told my mom she was concerned about my voice.  It was raspy sounding like someone who has smoked heavily for many years.  I went to see an EN&T Specialist.  He said I had nodules on my vocal chords that would have to be surgically removed.  Depending upon how deep they were, I might have to speak with a portable vocal vibrator (I don't know the official name).  Anyway, we went to the church and had the Deacons & Pastor anoint me and pray over me and when I went back to the doctor, the nodules were GONE!!  My mom told the doctor that God had cured me.  He said that must be it because he'd never seen that happen before.  I tell people now that God gave me a voice twice; once when I was born, and again when he healed me and that I want to use it for His glory.

A few months later, my dad & V.C. got a divorce.  Daddy started hanging around again and my mom was afraid he was going to take us again.  He asked her to re-marry him and she did because she figured that would keep him from running off with us again.  I don't remember this, but she said that I told her, "Mom, it's going to be the same old thing again"   They were together maybe another year and my dad moved back to Texas again.  We flew out to visit him one summer and then he asked my mom to move back to Texas.  She did.  I was in the 7th grade when we moved back to the Lonestar State.  I actually started 7th grade and went thru 12th grade in the same town at the same school!  However, even there, we moved 4 times.  Recently I counted up the times I have moved in my lifetime.  The number lies somewhere between 37 and 40 times by the age of 35! 
 
I never dated in high school.  There were guys I liked, but they thought that I was too much of a goody-two-shoes, because I was very vocal about my Christian beliefs in High School.  I figured I was too ugly as my dad told me.  He used to say, "You're pretty in 2 ways, pretty ugly and pretty apt to stay that way."  I know now that he was trying to be funny; but it was hurtful back then.  The only one that ever asked me out was an Hispanic boy and I didn't dare even tell my dad.  He was sooooooooo prejudiced.

Anyway, I know NOW that the lack of dating in my high school years was probably God's protection over me.  It would probably have gotten me into trouble.  Since I did not have the ideal father and was unconsciously searching for a love to replace what I did not receive from my dad, I'm thinking I might not have been as strong as I led all those boys to believe.

My first date was in college at West Texas State University.  I was 18 years old.  I went out with B.B.  We only dated a few times, nothing serious.  I went out with 2 other guys during my college career.  One was C that I finally got enough guts to ask out for Sadie Hawkins (sp).  Then I dated C.R.for awhile.

While at West Texas State University in Canyon, Texas.  I was very involved in the BSU (Baptist Student Union) and the FCA.  Although it wasn’t a Christian college, I almost felt like it was because there were a lot of Christian influences. 

While I was in college, my dad left for Hawaii where he had a job with an old friend of his, Bill Glass.  He didn't come back for a long time.  My mom filed for divorce again and they divorced right before Robert graduated from High School which was 1986.

My college was paid for by grants, scholarships, student loan, and I worked 2 jobs (35-40 hours/week).  I worked for the High-Plains Museum (on campus) in the Library & Archives, later for the Curator of Ethnology, then in the gift shop.  I also worked for a while at K-Mart and for the Canyon News as a  typesetter and proofreader.

During the summer of 1983 I served as a Summer Missionary in Tarrant County which is basically Fort Worth and the surrounding area.  We conducted Backyard Bible Clubs, VBS, Children's Camp, and worked in the "Projects" downtown Fort Worth. That's where I met J.H. &

L.K. L.K. asked me and my partner to do things with him during our term.  I think he was interested in one of us; but I’m not sure which one.  He knew that we couldn’t date while on our mission.  But we did become friends. Although, I thought his friend, J.H. was kinda cute. 

I went back to college at the end of the summer.  I finished in December 1983 (Associates Degree in Secretarial Studies).  The Baptist General Convention of Texas (Dallas) offered me a job.  I took the job and moved to Arlington.  L.K. helped me trade in my old car (the “Prayermobile”) for a little Toyota Corolla. I visited his church and saw  J.H. again.  Their church was too far a commute for me to become actively involved, so I joined a Mission Church that I had actually had the opportunity to help in the start-up phase as a summer missionary the summer before.  My boss was also the interim pastor.

About one month after I'd moved there, I got a call from J.H.  He said he'd been trying to get in touch with me for weeks and had decided if I didn't answer that night, he was going to give up.  (a line?  I don't know)  Anyway, we started dating.  What an awesome time we had! I fell totally “head over heels”.  We had some really fun dates.  It was so nice to date a guy that didn't push for physical intimacy.  What a wonderful Christian man he was and a TOTAL gentleman. 

We dated for awhile.  One night he said, "It would be really easy to fall in love with you."  Then I didn’t hear from him again.  Maybe I should have pursued the relationship.  Those feelings of inadequacy crept back in again, and I figured I just wasn't worth it.  I also felt that he was much more than I deserved anyway; so my heart was broken, but I never saw him again.  I wonder now if he was just afraid of falling in love because of what had happened with a former fiancee.

I moved from Arlington to Mesquite.  I got involved in another Mission Church there.  I met J.J. & M.J. (a husband & wife).  We became good friends.  A friend of mine, Nancy and I began having prayer meeting with them a couple of times a week before we left for work each morning.  I got along with them very well.  J.J. & M.J. talked a lot about their son R who was in the Air Force.  He was coming home for Christmas.  They set us up on a date for when he came home.

R got a medical discharge from the Air Force.  We started dating.  We got married almost a year later.  There were a lot of warning signs during our engagement; like friends that told me they were not sure I should be doing this.  I didn't listen to them.  There were also fights that we had that we came really close to breaking up before the marriage.  But I had always felt like God was calling me to the ministry, and he said he wanted to be a Youth Minister.  So I thought that I was doing the right thing (at least in my 21-year-old mind).

 We'd been married one year and four months when Tyler (Ty) was born.  We ended up having to move in with his parents when Ty was 6 months old.  Three months later, I was pregnant with Todd.  When Ty was one year old, we moved into a house in Garland, Texas.  I started babysitting during the weekdays to make money so I could stay home with Ty and "the baby" when he would be born. 

During that pregnancy, I felt a very strong “pull” toward the Lord.  My relationship deepened.  It was like God was pulling me toward Him and it was such an AWESOME time!!  While I was getting closer and closer to God, I felt I was getting further and further away from my husband.  Little did I know that when I was five months pregnant, He had started seeing someone that he worked with.  Todd was born in July, 1988.  Tyler was 18 months old.  My grandfather (my dad's father) died Thanksgiving day that year.  It wasn't until January (1989) that I found out about my husband's affair.  Tyler was almost 2 years old (2 weeks until his birthday).  Todd was just over 5 months old. 

My husband moved into an apartment with the girl which left me in a house I couldn't afford.  My mom lived in a one-bedroom apartment so we couldn't move in with her.  The boys and I ended up moving in with my in-laws.  A week after we separated, I found out I was pregnant again. I was making plans for a friend, Imelda, to go through childbirth classes with me.  I didn't know how I would get through it all, but I was just trusting that somehow the pregnancy would be the agent that would help heal our marriage.  Those hopes were shattered when on February 17, 1989 I had a miscarriage at 13 weeks.  But then, I thought that the miscarriage would bring us back together. It didn’t.

I needed a job, but I couldn't even go out and apply until after I'd healed from the miscarriage.  I found a job at the Baptist Annuity Board in the Member Services Department.  My brother, Ricky was moving into the area at that time.  My mom and he worked it out to where he could sub-let her apartment.  Then Mom and I (and the boys) rented a house together. 

My grandmother (Mom's mother) died in August of that year.  Then FINALLY in September I decided my husband and I probably were not ever going to get back together.  He was still living with his girlfriend.  I filed for divorce.  It was final on January 8, 1990.  We were married (including the time separated) for a whopping four years and three months.